Chudai Chawl Ke Chutiyaape – Part 1

Chudai Chawl Ke Chutiyaape - Part 1
‘Chudai Chawl’ mein apka swagat hai. Waise toh humare chawl ka naam woh nahi hai. Par kya farak padta hai. Aap agar humaare chawl mein ek din bhi rahe na, toh itni chudai dekh loge ke, koi aur naam yaad hi nahi rahega. ‘Chawl’ ka matlab toh jaante hi hoge naa? Aasan shabdon mein, chote saste ghar. Aur jaankari ke liye Google kar lena, lekin baadme. Mera naam hai Deepak Mishra. Yaad rakhna yeh naam jab aap meri kahaniyan dusro ko bataoge. Main chahta hoon ki aap log humare chawl ke baare mein jaane. Dopahar ka time hai. Shurvaat karta hoon main ek pari se. Chawl ki sabse sundar ladki jisne mera dil churaya hai. Khule aasmaan jaisi neele ankhe, nadi tak behte hue lambe ghane kaale baal. Mulayam gore gaal aur unme ghaayal karne waale dimple. Jab bhi dekhta hoon ek hi khayal aata hai, “Chaand mera dil, Chaandni…” Chaandni naam hai uska. Kabhi bolne ki himmat nahi hui par jabse dekha, use apni biwi banana chahta hoon. Himmat nahi hoti kyu ki jab bhi use milne jaata hoon, kisi na kisi se chudte hue dikhti hai. Kal hi ki baat hai. Garam samose lekar uske ghar jaa raha tha. Chawl ke dusre manzil par rehti hai, 208. Jab main uske ghar ki khidke se guzra toh dekha woh Chakor ke saath thi. ‘Tharki buddha’. Saala apne pairon par toh khada nahi ho sakta par apna khada kar Chaandni se massage karva raha tha. Woh bhi khushi-khushi uska lauda moh mein le, chus rahi thi. Yeh dekhkar mera lund do inch chota ho gaya. Kya kare, use ‘Bade achhe lagte hain’. Ek TV serial mein use sanskari bahu ka role mila hai. Shayaad isi liye woh sadi pehen kar babuji ki seva kar rahi hai. Babuji… Chakor ki bhi koi galti nahi hai. Yeh chawl hi aise hai. “Apne bahu se kyu nahi seva karvata, laudu!” Main man hi man bola. Chakor ki bahu ‘Chhaya Pal’. 40+ saal ki shaadhi shuda aurat. Gehua rang, kaale baal jo woh humesha baandhe rakhti hai, aur bade chuchhe. Chhaya bhabhi ne kafi kam umar mein shaadi ki aur jald hi baccha ho gaya. Tab jo unka stan bada hua, woh bada hi reh gaya. Waise toh unka naam Chhaya Chauhan hona chahiye tha. Par woh apne shaadi se pehle ka naam hi lagaati hai. Chhaya bhabhi buhot hi pyari hai. Jis kisi se milti hai, pyar se hi baat karti hai. Housewife hai, aur kya khaana banaati hi! Ungliyaan chaat-te reh jaaoge. Unhe English seekhne ka bohot shauk hai. Chawl ke ‘English master’ Vinayak ji se naye shabd seekhti hai. Aur jab-bhi mauka mile istamaal karti hai. Haal hi mein unhoone ek shab sikha ‘Cleavage’. Chhaya bhabhi humesha sari pehenti hai dheele blouse waale. Koi bhi unki khuli chhaati dekh pehla shab woh hi niklega. Tab se woh jis kisi se milti hai yahi puchti hai, “Mera cleavage kaisa lag raha hai?” Kabhi-kabhi toh woh apni sari sarka deti hai taaki chhaati sahi se dikhe. Woh chawl ke 201 mein rehti hai, apne pati, sasur aur bete ke saath. Jab main subhe unke ghar ke paas se jaa raha tha toh maine achaank unhe bolte hue suna, “Mera cleavage kaise lag raha hai aaj, sexy hai na?” Turant main ruka our khidki se andar jhak-kar dekha. Bhabhi apne sasur se do feet ki duri par apni chaati bahar nikaale khadi thi. Buddha 74 saal ki umar mein bhi apne lund ko rok nahi paa raha tha. Shayad isliye Chakor apna khada lund leke darbadar bhatak raha that jab Chaandni ne uska pakad liya. Par Chakor bhi kuch kam nahi hai. Jaise hi uski bahu ne ye sawal pucha, woh bola. “Pata nahi beta. Mujhe kuch aaj thik se dikh nahi raha hai,” apna haath aage karke bolta hai. “Thoda chu ke dekh lene do.” “Oo-maa-maa!” Bhabhi achanak piche ho gayi. “Siku kaha hai?” Siku yaane Sikandar, Chhaya bhabhi ka iklauta beta. Naam Sikandar hai lekin harkate bandar jaisi. Matlab batata hun. Humare chawl mein toilet-bathroom har ghar se juda hua nahi hai. Uski suvidha alag se, chawl ke piche ki jagah par hai. Public toilet ki tarah humare yahan bhi ‘Stri’ aur ‘Purush’ ke alag-alag bathroom hai. Maine aaj dekha toh nahi lekin daave ke saath keh sakta hoon ki Sikandar abhi ‘Stri’ vaale bathroom ke chhat par leta hoga. Chhat mein kiye hue ched se ladkiyon ko nahaate hue dekhne ki uski aadat purani hai. “Phone mein porn hai par mujhe live dekhna pasand hai,” woh bolta hai. Agar aap Siku ka phone dekho to usme chawl ke har ladki aur aurat ki nahaate hue ki video milegi. Sivaay uski maa aur Anamika ki. Isliye nahi ki woh Anamika se pyar karta hai, par isliye ki woh usse door bhagta hai. Anamika ek hi ladki hai jise pata hai ki Siku video nikalta hai. Phir bhi woh usi bathroom mein nahane jaati hai. Anamika, Sikandar se do saal choti, English master Vinayakji ki beti. Bohot hi himmatvali ladki hai woh. Chahe koi kuch bhi kahe woh sirf apni sunti hai. Ek bar woh apne pitaji Vinayak se boli, “Baba! Kyu saare ladke sirf towel pehne apen gar se bathroom jaate hai. Unhe kapde pehenne ko bolo!” Vinayakji ne kuch jawab nahi diya toh woh boli, “Thik hai, toh aaj se main bhi sirf towel pehen kar bathroom jaya karungi.” Aur tab se woh aisa hi karti hai. Aaj bhi woh sirf ek patla safed kapda lapete jaa rahi hai. Waise to dikhne mein woh khoobsurat hai, par aage se sapat. Itni patli hai woh ki uske chuche hai hi nahi. Isliye koi use is haalat mein dekh kar uttejit nahi hota. Aaj woh kuch jalde me thi. Uske piche jaate waqt uske nange gaand ki jalak mil rahi thi. Jaise he woh bathroom mein ghus rahi thi usne Siku ko waha se dur jaate dekha. Woh ruki aur mudke Siku ki taraf kadam badhaye. Achanak darwaza band hua aur uska towel usme phas gaya. Jab usne doosra kadam badhaya uska towel kul gaya. Aur woh puri nangi zameen par gir gayi. Uski choti gol jawan gaand khule mein thi. Chand second tak woh waise hi leti rahi. Tab ‘Purush’ wale toilet ke bahar ki katar mein khade log use nihaarne lage. Ek buddha admi toh apne pant mein haath daalkar hilane bhi laga. Use bohot sharam aaye par woh uth bhi nahi sakti. Un tharki chhokro mein se ek admi aage aya. Aur usne apna shirt utar-kar uske nage badan ko dhak diya.

Phir uska phasa towel nikal kar use pehna diya. Jayesh Chauhan, uska naam. Nata mota, choti muche rakhna wala, 50 ke kareeb umar ka aadmi. Anamika ki madat karne ke baad usne baaki logo ko gusse se dekha. Aisa lage ki woh abhi chillaega, “Sharm aani chahiye tum logo ko!” Par woh kuch nahi bola. Anamika ko laker chala gaya. Anamika ke ghar us samay koi nahi tha. Andar ghuste hi Anamika ne Jayesh ka shirt utar kar use de diya. “Are beti apne aap ko dhako.” Jayesh apni aankhe band karte hua bola. Par Anamika bina sharam ke waise hi khadi rahi. Usne toh apna towel bhi gira diya. Puri nangi hokar woh apne badan ko niharne lagi. “Kya fayda dhak kar, sabne toh mujhe dekh liya.” Woh apne stan ko chute hue boli. “Phir bhi, kuch pehen lo.” “Kya mein achhi nahi dikhti, uncleji?” “Aise baat nahi hai, beta.” “Toh aap ankhe kholkar kyu nahi dekhte mujhe?” Anamika ne uski taraf apne kadam badhaye. “Kya meri body achhi nahi hai?” Jayesh bina jawab diye, apni ankhe bandh rakhkar haatho se bahar ka rasta dhoond raha tha. Achank uske haathon ko Anamika ki chhaati lagi. Uske khade kadak nipples ko mehsus kar Jayesh chauk gaya, aur piche gir gaya. “Mujhe pata hai mere itne bade nahi hai,” woh apne chuche dabate hue boli. “Par ho jaayenge,” Jayesh ke muh se nikal gaya. “Phir bhi, mujhse shaadi kaun karege?” Usne apna ek haath sarka kar apni chut pe rakh diya aur dusra apne hoto par. Dono jagah ragadte hue dohrayi, “Kaun karega?” “Main,” Jayesh bola, “Mera beta hai na.” “Sacchi.” Anamika ye sunkar khush hui. Jayesh jab zameen se uthne ki koshish kar raha tha tab Anamika uske upar jaakar baith gayi. Uske pant mein khade land par apni chut ragadte hue boli, “Apko lagta hai Siku mujhse shaadi karege?” Woh apna muh kuch inch ki doori par laakar dabi aavaz mein puchi, “Karega?” “Karega.” Usne jawab diye. Yeh sunkar Anamika ne Jayesh ke hoton ko choom liya. Uske baad jo hua woh kisi ke kaabu mein nahi tha. Woh itne laparvah ho gaye ki khidki bhi band nahi ki. Anamika uski chhati chumte hue niche-niche gayi. “Kya main apko sasurji bula sakti hoon?” Jayesh ne kuch jawab nahi diya. Use kuch zyada hi maza aa raha tha. Phir usne Jayesh ki pant niche khichi. Ek jhatke mein uska lauda khambe jaisa khada ho gaya. Use ice-cream cone ki tarah chat-te hue boli, “Main apki isi tarah roz seva karungi.” Phir woh uska lauda pura nigal gayi aur chosne lagi. “Wah beta, tum tohhh.. bohot hi… ahh.” Uska sar pakad kar uske muh ko thokne laga Jayesh. Woh saans ke liye tadapne lagi. Par Jayesh ne use choda nahi, tab tak jab tak usne uska muh apen jhaag se bhar nahi diya. Anamika side mein thook kar Jayesh ko phir se hoton par choomne gayi. Tabhi Jayesh ne jhat se uski gaal par zor ka jhapad markar use side mein gira diya. “Pahele apna muh to dho lo, beta!” Dono khade ho gaye. Jayesh jaane se pehle uski gaand ko dono haatho se dabate hue bola, “Kal inke beech mein dalunga, saaf dhokar rakhna.” To be continued.